Month: May 2009

What is attractive on a girl?

Who am I am why do I know about what looks good on girls. I am an American living in Europe.  I also have two sisters, a wife and a daughter.  I have a lot of respect for women.  I am also honest. I am not trying to sell you anything an not a company.  I write my own language learning software.  I am writing this because I feel a lot of women are mislead as to what is good looking and what they should buy.  Companies spend lots of money on trying to convince you what is attractive on girls.  My guy friends and I are all pretty good looking, intellectual and I think they would also agree with my views.  Some guys will disagree but beauty is subjective.  I do not dance around the issue, I tell you what I honestly think.  If you disagree please let me know.  But what I write might shock you.

Lets start with what is not attractive on a girl

Here is my list of things that are things that detract from a girls beauty.

• Hair color changes are not attractive on girls.  Most girls hair looks fried, that is, their coloring damages their hair.  Also the hair looks fake.  I like real.  I do not like fake. Guys like real girls. Hair is big money and big business.  Give your wallet a break and try your natural color and you will see more guys will respond.  I know girls will protest, but this is true. Natural looks great. I personally have some of the most attractive shinny hair, I get girls asking me all the time what I do.  I wash it with only natural soap, but eat well and take vitamins.  A very natural diet, no caffine or junk.
• Too much make up is not attractive on a girl.  Basically a little lipstick is all girls need.  If your skin is not perfect spend money on vitamins or something very natural that will help heal your skin not mask it. Do not be affraid of imperfections.
• Too much grooming.  American girls have tons of cash and spend it on their looks.  Every eyebrow and part of them looks like a well manicured lawn in suburbia, nothing out of place. This is boring.  I like the wild, rustic look. Something thick eye browse look great.
• Body hair is good except on the face. Women are have OCD about shaving everything.  They should go easy on themselves.  It is instinctive to like hair, hair on a girl is good.  Sure shave your legs but do not go crazy. Girls care more than guys.  Girls do should not feel the need to pluck everything off so they look like a girl.  Be a women, this is attractive.
• Shoulder length hair is not attractive.  For me, shoulder length hair means,  I do not want long beautiful hair as its too much work, nor do I have the guts to do something radical like cut it real short. So I will be another boring girl with a bob.
• Tattoos, I want a girl not a sailor.
• Facial moles, very not cool if they are big an ugly. I do not recommend many body modifications, but mole removal is not bad if it is ugly.
• Fat is not attractive.  I like skinny girls as most guys do. This is why I think European, Russian, Ukrainian, Polish girls are much more attractive than American girls. Argue all you want, a girl who is skinny is attractive, a size 8 is not.
• Girls that are not humble are perhaps the biggest turn off.
• Perfume, its just petrochemicals on your body, why not use your own pheromones, this is attractive 100%.
• High heels look very uncomfortable to me and therefore no attractive.
• Foul language, smoking etc.
• Jewlery and anything in excess.

What than makes a girl look attractive?

Here is a list of thing that I think are attractive on a girl:

• Long hair or really short hair.
• Girls that show their face and do not cover it with hair.
• Thin girls.
• Glasses or not.
• Tight jeans and a t-shirt.
• See though shirts or tops.
• Earth tones or spring colors.
• Girls that keep fit.
• If you want to drive guys crazy try not wearing a bra.
• Girls that eat healthy are attractive.
• Brains and humility is attractive as well as wise girls. Stupid material girls are not.

In summary what is attractive on a girl?

Girls that spend money on looks are rarely attractive.  Girls that walk a lot, and wear clothes that are not to pricey, jeans and a nice top or sweater, earth colors.  Natural hair and look and lifestyle are beautiful.  Basically do not spend money on making yourself look good.  Any girl in Eastern Europe spending little, to no money on their looks, look great. Romanian, Russian girls etc total incomes might be a few hundred dollars a month. These European girls look much better than her American counter part spending cash on herself.  If you want to really attract guys play chess, read books, do yoga, learn a language.  This for me is interesting and attractive on a girl.

Live the life you dreamed of in your heart.  I am living my dream are you? Why not? I am no one special? Yet, I have what I want.  Let me start by saying, we all have issues in our lives that we are set up with. We all suffer and have trouble. Real life issues that seem to weigh on us more than we can handle. We do not like the way we look, our parents have no understanding of us and never will, we can not pay the bills, our job sticks and our relationships, do not even go there.  Som people have real physical illness on top of that.

Each person thinks that their problems are the hardest or others do not understand. I do.  Like that old African slave song goes ‘nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen’. Yet we all have issues, usually one major to over come in our lives. This is the human condition. Karmically it is set up this way. Yoga is like an accelerated course in learning to help you work through the issues in your life. You do not have to do it on the mat in yoga class, but it does not hurt to be in a group of people working though it, that is a yoga class. It helps.  Girls who do yoga are a usually, beautiful, easing going, and heart centered. If you are a girl consider trying yoga. If you are a guy, you have great incentives to go to a class full of yoga girls even if that is not your primary reason for showing up.

If you’re looking for hots of girls in yoga pants go here for a more detailed discussion on yoga girls.

Relationships appear out of nowhere when you do yoga

I have repeatedly recommended to do yoga if your relationship life is not up to par.  In time, the people who seemed unobtainable you will realize were people who were not for you anyway. We are all strands of energy between heaven and earth. And the cord they vibrate on were not for you. The good news is, the person for you will appear if you are the patient. In yoga class I have seen it time and time again.

If I was single and  living in the US or UK I would either date a yoga girl or take classes and see where it leads.  I am not a supernaturalists mind you. I just think that with a practice of yoga, your life will change and I do not know how to explain it.

Why date yoga girls? These girls are usually easy-going, spiritual and you have a chance for love with them.  In the States in Boston I did yoga several times a week and it was a great time for me personally.  Many of the women in the classes were not only physically flexible and  but also sincere.

On the other hand, with non yoga American girls you have huge walls to overcome, with little to no chance for love for true love. Maybe it is a certain generation of American women but they seem more bent on being right than having a husband. The exception would be is if they have some deep religious base.

I know this sounds unenlightened, but I would not date an American girl, nor recommend you do either.  I think American culture is filled wth feminism and on the surface spiritual, but in reality not too friendly or open. It is a huge generalization but I think this is what my American guy friends have said. The net result is both genders are lonely and not happy in relationships, not matter how many match.com dates they go on. Why date a taker when you are a giver? This is what most American women are takers (except yoga girls and of course exceptions). I would recommend a Polish or Indian girls for example. Why not meet a girl at yoga boot camp?

Yoga is a serious form of opening up your life. However, compassion and heart centered energy is a major point in this practice.

How to get a girl to fall in love with you

Because women are responsible having and raising children they are very careful who they they will fall in love with.  To get a girl to fall in love with you is the easiest and the hardest thing in the world to do depending on your approach. If you are young and you really like a girl but she does not notice you, remember there are plenty of fish in the sea and the best ones are yet to come., but consider my advice is as follows if you want to get a girl at any age.

Why girls make you wait

My advice is this, girls are funny, they will often despise guys and think they are freaks, only later to fall in love with them and marry them. I do not know why girls are like this, but I think it has something do with it takes time for a girl to analysis a guy in her subconscious before she becomes aware of him and her subconscious gives her the OK.  A guy can see a girl and say wow, this one is beautiful, and start projecting all kinds of ideals on her. Woman on the other hand, because of biology, are not as likely to do that.  They have to take time to get to know a guy, not personally, but subconsciously.  Seeing them in yoga class, or at the gym or at school a few months. Even if she has never thought of this guy concisously her mind is processing what he is about. What girls look for to fall in love: What her mind is processing is: is the guy 1) normal 2) sincere 3)  interesting.  In my opinion, for love, that is it.  Really girls do not like weird guys, liars or boring guys.

How to get a girl to love you if you are not normal

No one is normal. In fact, woman love the French film Amelie because they all see themselves as an abnormal shy freak, they see themselves in this film. But there is good abnormal and bad abnormal. Good abnormal is another word for interesting and not afraid of your weird dreams. Bad abnormal is if you are into anything that can cause harm to others or have fanatical views.  The key thing is be the abnormal person you are as long as you can make a girl feel safe, and you will not hurt anyone nor have judgemental extreme views. My point is if you want a girl to fall in love with you is be the freak that you are, but be peaceful, light and breezy and make sure the girl knows you are easy going.

Girls will chew you up and spit you out if you are a cheat and a liar

If you are looking for action, be straight with a woman, do not lie to get it.  If you are looking for love, do not cheat.  If you are  depressive, tell them, I think girls have no problem with problems just insincerity or when you try to hide things.  You will find all kinds of people in this world and there is someone for everyone, as long as you are honest. Do not try to impress girls, they do not go for it, despite what you think. By the way I think girls lie more than men.

I love you: Geek

Girls do not like meat guys, they like geek guys. Meat not geeks get love and happiness.

Me I love, Russian literature and fantasize about going to Siberia one day. I am an American from Boston,  left my career because I always wanted to learn Polish.  I moved to Poland.  I like chess and play it all night. I do not drink or smoke or stay up past 9 pm, I am not cool in any way shape or form. If I do get dragged out to a club I wear big ear plugs. I am very allegric to cats. I think I even have a little OCD.  I like ballet and drinking Kvas.  I am a freak about Eastern Europe and could be a rich guy in America, but I am an Eastern Europe geek and live like a pauper here following my passion traveling on a shoe string and learning languages.  However,  I have more romantic appeal to girls than a jock, or a movie star or a rapper or a rich lawyer or business guy or ‘important person’, whatever. Why? I am a geek like you,  and I have interesting passions and I am sincere, even if it costs me fame and fortune.   I am true to myself.  If you are true and honest with yourself and really mean it, you will get the girl of your dreams to fall in love with you.  I did.

Why have a wife?

I believe in love with no limits and marriage.  How come so many people ask the same questions: why get married? why have a wife? and the answers you hear are ‘don’t get married,  ‘your lady friend will make you unhappy in a few years, you will see.’

The purpose of marriage is to help your spouse get to heaven.

Why wives quit marriage and make men unhappy

(Disclaimer: some American women are wonderful people and make wonderful wives, I guess, maybe). But, most marriages do not work because American wives and husbands lack humility, which is putting the family including the husband first or wife. I expect the same from men as women.  For the ultimate virtue in a man or a woman, I would consider humility as a top candidate.  Humility comes from the strength of being able to humble yourself to ideals and including another person.  I think singles, first and foremost lack this strength called humility and therefore, give up on ideals, if they ever had any. There is your answer plain and simple of why marriages do not work. Yes, it can be the man’s fault, if he lacks humility, but this article is written for men on how to find the right wife.  We can debate this until we are blue in the face, but the reality is, often because of the culture an American wife lacks humility.

Good wives and bad wives

The good news is there are many girls in the world, and not every wife is the same. Let’s compare an American wife to a foreign or Russian or European wife. Why? If you marry an American girl, 64% chance you will get a divorce and almost 80% of the divorces are filed by women.  If you marry a foreign lady friend, you have an 18% chance of divorce, and if you marry the right one 0%.

An American wife in the in good old days

Your wife cooked cleaned and was nice and sweet to you.  Your spouse made you feel good about yourself. Your wife made you feel even better at bedtime. Your wife was also focused on making your life more peaceful. Also with an old fashion American wife, your kids loved you and stayed with you and you got to relive your childhood with them as you spend time with them.

American women now

40% of American babies are born out of wedlock, men to the American women are disposable.  American women do not cook or clean, complain and try to change you. Women that complain about their husbands are bad news.  They make you feel bad and it is totally disrespectful to you as a person.  I would not want to make anyone feel bad, let alone my spouse.  Generally, these lady friends take away your peace. With these lady, friends forget any fun in bed after marriage. Further, your lady friend can take more than 100% of your money.  All you will have to look forward to is the sweet kiss of death to set you free.

What is the solution to find a good wife?

Easy, marry, non-American women or an American woman who has humility.

Why get married?

It will make your life happier than you can ever imagine possible.  But if and only if you do not marry an American girl, that is you have a foreign lady friend.

Life is about having fun and enjoying your life, and so is marriage.   Marriage, I believe, is like love is forever. I am married to an Eastern European girl. Life and marriage for me is not only a romantic and spiritual dream come true but pure fun. If you have any questions about marriage, lady friends, or how to find a wife, just ask.